Category Archives: Inspirational and Self-Help

Tweets by The Wise Sloth #5

 

Faith takes courage until it requires ignoring evidence. Then it takes cowardice, dishonesty and delusion.

Most of Guns N’ Roses’ songs are love songs. They’re basically a louder version of Tailor Swift.

Science answers “what” using evidence. Philosophy answers “why” using logic. Religion answers “what” and “why” with faith in ancient mythology

I predict in five years, every movie scene will be filmed in orange and teal lights.

Focus on what you’re doing, not what you want. You climb a mountain by taking steps, not by obsessively staring at the peak.

Your life won’t improve until you improve your thoughts.

If you’re ever feeling bad, try thinking of something good.

You won’t find peace outside of you until you find peace inside of you.

I challenge any Christian to read Exodus and Leviticus ten times, and then say, “I see no evidence of mythology or primitive culture here.”

 

Someone should print a Bible with all the fucked up parts in red. Then you can give it to Christians and say, “Sell me on anything in red.”

Charging the shit out of anyone who misses a payment on a debt, wouldn’t happen in any place faintly resembling Utopia.

Your value is set by how much love you give, not by how much you recieve.

If you’re a Christian, and haven’t given everything to the poor, I assume you either don’t know what the Bible says or you lack conviction.

 

My only problem with fast food chains is they use slave labor to sell poison to the public and markup the cost as high as the market allows.

America would be better off if every news anchor was a licensed psychologist, instead of a surreal-acting sensationalist.

You’d think the pickier you are, the sweeter life will be, but the less picky you are, the less difficult life will be.

Floating islands could solve extreme poverty, refugee crises and pollution 

I’m not saying this is deep. I just couldn’t not share it:

I knew an inmate who refused to work in the prison sweat shop. When asked why. He said, “If I wanted to be a slave, I wouldn’t have sold drugs”

Any president who doesn’t talk about the fact that state-sanctioned slavery going on in U.S. prisons, is a complete failure at their job.

This is how I feel when people thank me for my military service: 


How solve extreme poverty and every refugee crises

The low, low prices at your favorite store were brought to you by the slaves who made the products, not the generosity of the store owners.

I hate it when you watch a video on Youtube, and afterwards you think, “Fuck. That’s what you just did with that time in your life.”

I want to leave snarky replies to Trump’s tweets, but I assume my name will automatically be put on Trump’s terrorist watch list #trumptweet

Responsibility is doing what you need before doing what you want.

There are 2 kinds of people: ones who treat others well because they care and ones who treat others bad because they only care about theirself.

When the politician you’ve been dogmatically defending has the lowest approval rating in history, it’s time to consider you might be wrong.

Trump’s campaign slogan should have been, “The disaster America needs.”

Failing is practicing, and practicing is succeeding.

No politician is “for women’s rights” as long as it’s illegal for women to take their shirt off.

The more afraid a population is, the more conservative it’ll behave. The more hopeful a population feels, the more progressive it’ll behave.

Should transsexuals be allowed in the military? A politically agnostic veteran’s perspective

 

“Every man is a creature of the age in which he lives, and few are able to raise themselves above the ideas of the time.”

Doctors and football coaches disagree with the following statement: It is never a good idea to bang your head against anything.

If you don’t read the comments on Trump’s Twitter feed, you should. Hope he does. I couldn’t imagine how it feels to get called out so bad.

The larger the group of people you blame the world’s problems on, the more likely you’re just an intellectually lazy bigot.

Walking in big American cities is dangerous. If the cops don’t get you, the criminals will.

Outline of the plot to Star Wars: A New Hope

If anything should be illegal, charging interest on interest should be right after murder and rape.

Do you think about how many lives you could save with $1million, right before you spend $1million on a car, toy or experience for yourself?

If you can afford a $200 million home, all of your employees better have pensions, or you’re definitely going to Hell after you die.

 

Every time you try to sound smart, you just sound like you’re trying to sound smart, which smart people know smart people don’t do.

If welfare isn’t working in your country, it doesn’t mean welfare is evil. It means your government’s bureaucracy is broken and needs fixing.

If we can’t redistribute the rich’s wealth to the poor, let’s at least redistribute the taxes poor people pay to services that help them.

If people keep stereotyping you as the worst member of your group, don’t try to fix your accusers. Raise up the broken members of your group.

 

There’s a time and a place to bitch about the dangers of illegal immigration. In summer, when Jose is landscaping your lawn, is not the time.

If someone says workers should be paid/treated better, it doesn’t mean they’re Communist. Communism and workers rights aren’t mutually exclusive.

Floyd Mayweather vs. Conor McGregor: A cautionary tale 

 

By expressing yourself, you create yourself.

If you cash a lottery ticket and use the winnings to buy cigarettes in lieu of payment, that’s a metaphor for your level of hope in life.

The people I know who have been depressed the longest, tend to have spent the least amount of time actively engaging themselves in treatment.

 

If you haven’t worked towards your goal today, then having fun and playing games isn’t rewarding yourself. It’s how you’re failing.

Twitter would work better if you could tag your Tweets with hashtags the same way blogs do, separate from the text. #twitter #tweet #hashtag

Like how businesses do random drug screenings on employees, governments should do random corruption and war crimes screening on politicians.

Since America is jailing people for doing things that hurt them, it should criminalize fanatical patriotism and making excuses for politicians.

 

Since America is jailing people for doing things that hurt them, they should make it illegal not to learn something new every day.

Social issues can’t be solved if the only people talking about them and offering solutions, are the most radical members of each side.

If you’re enrolled in a liberal arts college and can afford to protest, you’re in the top 10% of most privileged people in the world.

The more worried you are what labels other people use, the more likely you’re too privileged to know the war the rich are waging on the poor.

America needs to mourn the deaths of all those who can’t afford overpriced healthcare as much as they mourn the latest celebrity to die.

You deserve the money you earn, but ask yourself, “How many lives can I save?” You’re evil if you decide to spend it on just pampering yourself.

If Christians got their morals from the Bible, they wouldn’t make excuses to disregard the archaic rules in the Bible they don’t believe.

Radical feminists most likely to angrily demand more empowered female leads in movies, are most likely to play the victim card in real life.

 

Plot outline of Back to the Future

Plot outline of Star Wars: Return of the Jedi

Plot outline of Jurassic Park

Plot outline of Bladerunner

How bosses are literally like dictators

Billionaires won’t save you and Socialism won’t kill you

 

“Man is not affected by events, but by the view he takes of them.” Epictetus

The poor need a new economic system more than Bill Gates or Warren Buffet need $70 billion.

Science and religion fill different needs. Science fills the need for hard facts. Religion fills the need for intellectually lazy mythology.

If you liked these tweets, subscribe to my Twitter feed or read them on this site by following the links below:

  • Tweets by The Wise Sloth: #1#2#3, #4

Modular floating islands could solve extreme poverty, refugee crises and pollution

There are currently about 100 million people who are living homeless because they had to flee a war zone, and there are just as many homeless people living in “peaceful” countries. A billion people live on less than $2.50 per day, and two more billion people live below the poverty line because they don’t have access to resources or opportunities.

Despite the world spending over $100 billion dollars on humanitarian aid and trillions more on public infrastructure, poverty is only getting worse, because traditional cities separate people from sources of jobs, food, water, utilities, entertainment and education. The current housing system is designed to make real-estate more expensive, the more conveniently located it is, which means the poorer you are, the more expensive, dangerous, discouraging, unhealthy and opportunity-less your life will be.

If every country pooled $50 trillion, they could solve extreme poverty and refugee crises by building a self-sustainable apartment complex/office building in the shape of a ring, 100 miles in diameter, where every resident will have immediate access to food, water, shelter, jobs and transportation. As long as predatory capitalists don’t take over the city and raise prices and lower wages to extortion levels, every resident would be able to live fear-free for life.

400 dollar house

A project of this size would face many hurdles. One of the biggest would be, where to build it? One solution to that problem, is to build it on water. This approach would be more expensive, but the benefits might outweigh the cost.

It wouldn’t take much engineering to build a floating city. Instead of building a huge, floating base and then putting a city on top of it, build hollow modules that connect together. Then, a big wave wouldn’t knock any houses or businesses over, because everyone would be living and working “underground.” The surface area could be used to grow food and raise animals.

All you need to make a floating house is a boat hull. You could cast them out of concrete. Engineers have been building hollow concrete boats and caissons for years.

The technology could be easily adapted to mass producing floating houses. Or you could make the hulls out of fiberglass or steel. It might be more expensive, but it would cost less to build a modular fiberglass bobber house than to build a shack in Honolulu or New York City.

Even the sturdiest buoy city would be capsized by a mega wave on the open ocean eventually, but instead of building a monolithic island in international waters, you could connect a line of modular floating homes along the coast of a relatively protected body of water, like the Caspian Sea or the Great Lakes.

If this mega structure were built in the Mediterranean Ocean, you could create a walkable path from Africa to Europe. Refugees wouldn’t use it to invade Europe, because they would already have ocean-front property and everything they need to raise a family. You could use that path as a new trade route, and the new most popular tourist destination in the world.

We wouldn’t need to fight over one location for the project. The governments of the world could build one hundred module factories around the world and gradually build a chain around every protected body of water. Life might be so idyllic, the majority of humans will flee the mainland and leave it to Mother Nature.

I believe the environmental benefit of a floating civilization would outweigh the risks. Since all the food, water and utilities would be created in-house, less packaging and transportation would be needed to get the necessities of life from their point of creation to consumption. The modules could be equipped with traps that filter pollution out of the water, and the hulls of the boats would provide new artificial reefs for fish to eat from.

This idea is crazy for being outside the norm, but not because it’s unfeasible. The richest 1,200 people in the world have over $50 trillion sitting in their bank accounts not doing anything. That’s more than enough money to house every refugee and homeless person in the world off-land. Even if governments footed the entire bill themselves, the money they’d save in humanitarian aid and social services would pay for itself quickly. Plus, it would create jobs, lower unemployment, food scarcity and realestate costs.

Sadly, that’s why the governments of the world would never conspire to build this. If governments cared about their people, they wouldn’t have invested their tax dollars on building unsustainable habitats to begin with. The rich need the poor to live in constant fear and danger, because that gives them the leverage to exploit the helpless. Our cities are designed to create scarcity, because it lowers workers’ and consumers’ bargaining power, which allows businesses to raise prices and lower wages. Extreme poverty and refugee crises exist because the global economy is designed to oppress and exploit the poor.

It’s almost impossible to get rich without gouging your customers and/or employees. So most rich people would be acting contrary to their past behavior if they donated their fortune to building a self-sustainable floating refugee camp, but there are a lot of philanthropists out there with more money than they know what to do with. Hopefully some of them find the motive to give back to the world they’ve taken so much from.

If compassion and foresight won’t compel the rich to mass-produce floating city modules, greed should. The first person to streamline the process will become the Donald Trump of the seas. After Trump runs America into the ground, building a new nation at sea might be his only hope of redemption. Granted, being the greedy sociopathic narcissist that he is, his city would probably be full of slaves serving masters. However, if he can establish and improve floating island technology, it would be worth it as proof of concept. Then better people can copy his architecture and build the humanitarian communities we’ve been waiting for.

As a compromise, an island-loving billionaire like Mark Zuckerberg, could build a modular island factory, produce a string of islands, and after all the agriculture jobs are filled, train new residents as computer programmers, give them jobs that generate a profit, and keep a portion until the cost of construction is repaid, then give the employee ownership of their module.

If you liked this post, you’ll also like these:


Deep Tweets by The Wise Sloth #4

When you’re learning a skill, don’t worry about failing. Just worry about not quitting.

Typically, you can’t be drunk and working towards self-actualization at the same time.

The less sober you are, the less focused on fulfilling the meaning of your life you are.

If you’re thinking of quirky ways to offer your employees conditional bonuses, it’s probably because you don’t pay them what they deserve.

The longer we debate/compare Capitalism, Socialism and Communism, the less time we spend designing a new system tailored to today’s needs.

A day you don’t teach yourself knowledge that helps you achieve your ultimate goal, is a day wasted.

The more someone hates you, the more likely you and them are both partially right.

The more you believe that only the natives in your country deserve to live and work there, the less you believe all humans are one family.

The more you shit test your lover, bitch at them and tear them down, the more threatened you should feel by sex robots. #theredpill

Every time you watch dumb TV shows or listen to dumb music, you vote for the world being dumb. Ultimately, that’s a vote for extinction.

The more you hate a group of people, the more you should question the motives of the people who warned you about that group… regardless.

The office building you dream about paradise from used to be paradise before an office building was built on it.

The more passionately you defend your beliefs, the more passionately you should question your beliefs.

The more you believe your culture should be imposed on the entire world, the more likely you’re a gullible follower in a terroristic cult.

The more you try to make your lover feel guilty, the more you fail at being a good lover.

If you didn’t compliment your lover today, you failed at being a good lover today.

If you didn’t tell your lover how much you value them today, you failed at being a good lover today.

The more you believe God ordained that your culture should be practiced on the land you were born on, the more gullible you probably are.

The more you believe that people who aren’t exactly like you are the root of your country’s problems, the more gullible you probably are.

The more you devote your life to policing other people’s sex lives, the less you devote your life to policing deadly human rights abuses.

I’m not saying, “Don’t challenge other people’s beliefs,” but you’d improve the world more by challenging your own beliefs.

The more you believe victimless crimes should be policed by the government, the less you believe in freedom.

In January 2017, Texas made it illegal to have a 3rd break light out. If this was for safety, all vehicles would be required to have them.

“Socialism = employee ownership of businesses with profit sharing

Socialism does not = nationalizing businesses to create a welfare state”

If you haven’t sold everything you own and given it all to the poor, don’t tell me you’re a Christian.

If the politicians and the media didn’t divide America into “left” and “right,” nobody else would.

I predict that by 2020, the price of literally everything you buy will include a “service charge” and/or “processing fee.”

If you argue that anyone who is anti-Trump is anti-America, then you must argue that anyone who is anti-Obama is anti-America. #trump

It’s cool that the poor live better than ever before, but getting hung up on that fact ignores that they still live in perpetual fear.


 

Your employees might have more pride in your company if you gave them paychecks they can feel proud of.

CNN being an embarrassment of a news outlet doesn’t change the fact that Donald Trump is an embarrassment of a president. #cnnblackmail

Don’t expect people you’re not nice to, to be nice to you.

Every American who hates immigrants, doesn’t tell the waiter at their favorite authentic Asian and Mexican food restaurants about it.

The Hollywood movie plot outline structure 

Charisma is a virtue, but the more intoxicatingly charismatic your leader is, the more likely they’re a sociopath and you’re gullible.

The more involved with a religious organization you are, the more useful it will be to you to study the red flags of cults and mythology.

Life won’t get better for the majority until sharing is more mainstream than greed.

You have more to gain by disproving your argument than by disproving your enemy’s.

Science is just theories, but religion is just mythology.

Religious people are like alcoholics. They can be functioning but not fully functioning.

If you’ve never Googled, “how to think objectively, reasonably and/or logically,” the evidence says you should assume you can’t…but should

TV shows with commercials are tantamount to commercials for commercials.

If you have to worry about your government taking away your access to health care, patriotism might be more suicidal than virtuous.

How much longer can we pretend Donald Trump is a real president? And by “we,” I mean, “Donald Trump.”

Stories are like Celtic knots. You can make good ones without planning, but there’s a limit to the elegance you can achieve. #writing

If you find yourself reluctantly admitting you were wrong about Trump being great, consider you were wrong about G. W. Bush being great also

Tales from The Wise Sloth: My UFO story 

Justifying hurting people is always justifying being one of the bad guys.

The more you think you know, the less it proves you do.

Nobody would know technology is tearing us apart, if technology hadn’t connected us.

The more famous you become, the less accurately you’ll be remembered.

You can overcome the punches the world throws at you. When you beat yourself up, you don’t have a fighting chance.

It’s surprising how many times you can have an excuse that sounds perfect on paper but doesn’t really apply or mean shit in reality.

Just because you took a class in college doesn’t mean you know shit about shit.

High schools really need to teach classes on defining and maintaing your self-worth.

I predict in 2020 Elizabeth Warren will beat Paul Ryan to be the U.S. president. Then she’ll change America about as much as Obama did.

Whoever told you not to ask questions and be skeptical probably also told you to give them money.

I’m ready for politicians to declare war on bills.

Any story of God coming to Earth in human form that involves God making booze for a party was probably written solely by humans.

If God is all-powerful and wants to forgive us, he never needed to sacrifice himself to himself before he could allow himself to forgive us.

It’s not mature to learn how to follow orders if you’re taught to obey psychopathic , sociopathic, greedy, megalomaniac, idiot leaders.

You’ll never be able to live in your dream home because you spent it building the dream homes of your favorite businesses’ owners.

Why hasn’t Hollywood made a TV series about a redneck MacGuyver yet? Emphasis on the word, “yet.”

It’s only a matter of time until we see a movie about Google inventing an artificial intelligence based on the internet’s hive mind.

Think about about how “successfully” L. Ron Hubbard invented his own religious cult. Then imagine what Alex Jones could accomplish.

Watching/waiting for politicians to do something right is slower and more exhausting than watching software installation progress bars. Sad.

When politicians tell you someone is coming to kill your family, it’s to distract you from noticing someone who is coming to take your money

You can’t come up with good ideas without coming up with bad ideas in the process.

Thinking about good things generally makes you feel good. Thinking about bad things generally makes you feel bad.

When I watched “Cool as Ice” at a drive-in movie theater, I didn’t know how old saying that would make me sound some day.

If you’ve ever heard of the town, Paris, TX and wonder what it’s like, I can tell you from experience, it’s the red neck Twilight Zone.

Invent a game like “Magic: The Gathering,” except instead of battling monsters, you do/learn what it takes to succeed in relationships.

If we need soldiers to be able to get dishonorable discharges, it must be more important for politicians to be subject to the same standard.

Don’t die without having told as many people as possible the most important knowledge you learned in your life.

Whenever someone says you have to give them a yes or no answer right now, say no.

 

It’s amazing how bad of a person you can be when you convince yourself you’re a ideal person.

Everyone is: 1.Insane 2. A child 3. So lost they don’t know how lost they are. When you understand that, dealing with people gets easier

If you’re not reading or listening to new knowledge daily, then don’t expect yourself to become much less idiotic.

The angrier you behave on the internet, the more you need to talk to a therapist about your past traumas.

FYI: Just because you had a child doesn’t mean you’re an adult.

It shouldn’t surprise you that Billionaires make bad presidents. All their professional experience revolves around exploiting the public.

Just once I’d like a politician to declare war on bullshit charges in bills like “processing fees,” “service fees,” etc.

I wish every page, video, picture and audio file on the internet had a button on it that lets you rank its quality and usefulness.

In a perfect world we would have instructional classes in school on dating, sex and masturbation.

Unless your goal is throwing away allies, you’re not winning anything by being mean to strangers.

The meaner your leadership philosophy is, the more you’re going to inspire your team to hate you and want you to fail.

In a perfect economy there would be no middle men.

People who don’t want to fuck you don’t go out of their way to talk to you.

Companies tell you their product is happiness, but they know what they’re really selling you is poverty.

My theory on why so many women have rape fantasies

I would have watched “Care Bears” when I was a kid if one of them was named “Jean Claude Van Damme Heart.”

Most meth users I’ve met aren’t idle. They work at jobs that almost require meth to make it through an exhausting, soul crushing work day

What I think about Satan 

Instead of staffing government mostly with lawyers , we should staff it mostly with computer programmers. Couldn’t be any worse.

If you believe in superstition, it shows you don’t think. Also, the belief that cuss words are evil is superstitious.

America is like a rice cake covered with Nutella, sweet and unfilling.

When I was taught how to eat a fancy dinner with redundant silverware, I thought, “Man, rich people have so few problems they create them.”

Don’t give parents tax breaks. Pay them through the DOE so they can be held accountable like teachers for their kids’ academic failures.

They tell you to go to college to learn. They don’t tell you half your professors will just teach you their shitty life story.

Poverty will always be epidemic as long as the rich make the rules.

Deep Tweets by The Wise Sloth: #1#2#3

If you liked these tweets, subscribe to The Wise Sloth’s Twitter feed.


My middle of the road theory on sexual morality and gender labels

If an American turned on their television in the 1950’s, they’d see women cooking and cleaning the house, and men going to work in business suits. Boys played with toy guns, and girls played with dolls. There were only two choices for sex and gender, but it wasn’t really a choice, because the genitals you were born with determined how society expected you to behave.  If you were born with a penis, you acted like Ward Clever, and if you were born with a vagina, you acted like June Clever.

In the 1950’s, American television culture was so prudish, sitcoms weren’t allowed to show married heterosexual couples in the same bed.  So husbands and wives were always portrayed sleeping in separate twin-sized beds, fully clothed. When the children who grew up watching “Leave it to Beaver” became adults, they considered the sitcom, “Three’s Company” obscene, because it showed a single man living with two single females. To the old timers’ dismay, “Three’s Company” was popular enough with the younger generation to last eight seasons.

In 2004, the Baby Boomers who grew up on “Three’s Company” considered “The L Word” obscene because it showed promiscuous lesbians living together and getting married. The only reason “The L Word” was allowed on television at all, was because it aired on late night cable, far from the impressionable eyes of children.

It didn’t take another twenty years for society to accept the next next jump in which sexual norms are allowed to be shown on television. In less than a decade, the bonds of tradition loosened to the point that NBC (a family-oriented channel) produced, “The New Normal,” a sitcom in which two gay men hire a woman to be a surrogate mother for their child.

If that wasn’t enough to give Baby Boomers heart attacks, they also had to come to terms with  shows like “Ru Paul’s Drag Race” and “Keeping up with the Kardashians,” in which transsexuals openly demand to be celebrated. To the old timers’ dismay, both of those shows are so popular with young people, they’ve already lasted more seasons than “Three’s Company.”

In the history of mankind, society has never changed this fast. The reason this is happening now, is because technology is spreading information to people, who are learning more, faster than ever. Radio and TV were unprecedented, but the invention of the internet sped up communication exponentially, and its pace is still compounding. If things are changing so fast right now your head is spinning, it’s going to have spun completely off your body in twenty years, because this whirlwind of change is only going to get faster.

Sexual orientation and gender norms have always been debated, but the conversation has never been this polarized or violent. The reason the national dialogue on sex and gender isn’t as calm as it was in the 1990’s is because we’re all in uncharted territory. The young, progressive liberals leading the charge are as lost as the elderly conservative curmudgeons who are holding onto tradition. Moderates in the middle are wondering who is less wrong.

For example, you used to be considered a liberal progressive if you believed in women’s right to work or homosexuals’ right to marry, but if the progressive social justice warriors get their way in 2017, when you fill out a job application that asks your gender, it will have to include 50-80 different types of gender pronouns your coworkers will have to address you by, according to your choice.

Don’t ask me to explain this chart. I don’t know.

To some of America’s social justice warriors, those pronouns aren’t enough to accurately label everyone. So they invented a chart explaining how sex and gender are part of a spectrum, which children can use to determine the nature of their gender and sexuality. Every American agrees freedom of choice is a good thing, but even moderate liberals laugh and cringe at The Gender Unicorn.

There actually is a degree of truth to the fluidity of sex and gender, but it’s more nuanced than social justice warriors or Christians are ready to admit. For starters, the traditional way of thinking about sex and gender is that there are only two possibilities. You’re either a boy with a penis or a girl with a vagina. Life isn’t that simple. Sex organs are determined by chromosomes. If you have an XY chromosome, you’ll be born with a penis and all the hormones that make you think and act masculine. If you have  XX chromosomes, you’ll be born with a vagina and all the chromosomes that make you think and act feminine.

However, people are often born with a mismatched combination of chromosomes like XXY, XXXY, or just X. These genetic codes create mixed signals within people’s body. Some combinations will cause someone to have the body of one sex, but the mental wiring of the other.  This makes them feel like they’re living in the wrong body, and no amount of will-power or philosophizing is going to change that. In these cases, getting a sex change is a drastic, but legitimate, choice.

Some conservatives argue this saying, “You may have the choice to cut your dick off, but how is that not insane?” Well, insanity is defined as “a pattern of mental or behavioral patterns that may be abnormal to social norms and definitely causes someone to be a danger to themselves or others.”

Chopping your dick off is definitely abnormal. It’s probably not going to cause you to harm other people, but the suicide rate among transsexuals is above average. So technically, being a transsexual fits the definition of insanity, but so does autism and ADHD. Down syndrome and neurofibromatosis are caused by abnormal chromosomes. So if you’re going to hate transsexuals for being born with a more difficult genetic makeup to manage than the average person, then you need to hate almost everybody.

Some transsexuals don’t have abnormal chromosomes, but their life experiences convinced them to seek a new identity. For example, I once met a man who got a sex change and lived as a woman. He was molested repeatedly by his father as a child, and he told me that at one point, when he was being raped, it was like a switch went off in his head. He remembered thinking, “Daddy has sex with mommy, and daddy is having sex with me. So I must be a mommy.” The rest of his life was a downward spiral into confusion and self-destructive behavior. Technically, this person’s thoughts and behavior fit the definition of insanity, but if you’re going to hate him for that, you’re not trying to understand anything, and you’re one of the bad guys.  Even if he made the wrong decision, that doesn’t mean he deserves to be hated.

On a lighter note, I once met a teenage girl who identified as a man, but she spent her evenings shopping for shoes on her smart phone and doing everything girls do, including dating guys. She got swept up in the social movement for sexual equality before she was old enough to understand genetics and found a niche that gave her an identity even though it didn’t truly fit her. She’ll undoubtedly grow out of it, like I grew out of my heavy metal phase.Does this make her an insane piece of shit who deserves to be spat on? No. She’s just a naive kid trying to find herself, like the rest of us.

Her story doesn’t change the fact that there are more than two types of chromosome patterns humans can be born with. Transsexuals are real. If you can’t accept that, then you don’t believe in reality, which fits the definition of insanity. At the same time though, you don’t get to decide you’re a real transsexual just because it’s trendy.

If the poser transsexual I mentioned above wants to wear pants instead of dresses, and get a job instead of raising children, her decision is amoral, not immoral. Scottish men wear kilts. Arab men wear a long, flowing garb called a thawb, which looks dress-like to Westerners. Different cultures all over the world, and throughout history, have assigned different gender roles to men and women, including how they dress, act and work.

These kind of gender differences are social constructs that we have social pressure to follow but no moral obligation. Anyone can dress however they want. Clothing patterns are a non-issue. If you believe you have a divine duty to enforce your parents’ dress code on everyone else, you’re intellectually lazy at best, and insane at worst.

Granted, telling a preschooler they get to choose how to define their sexuality and gender role for the rest of their life is setting them up for failure. If you tell a five year old boy he can be whatever he wants, he’s more likely to choose to be a dinosaur than a girl.

Kids don’t know what the hell is going on, and this is all the more reason we shouldn’t encourage girls to wear dresses and play with Barbies, and boys to wear pants and play with action figures. We’re indoctrinating kids with gender roles that wouldn’t matter if they were broken. In the cosmic scale of things, the clothes you wear don’t matter. They’re useful, but it’s unnecessary to force people to wear clothes that fit your fleeting cultural upbringing.

Another unnecessary social construct is the idea that everyone under the age of eighteen is going to be traumatized by seeing genitals. No other animal on the planet gets worked up over seeing genitals, and children who grow up in nudist colonies don’t leave traumatized. Their curse is having to live the rest of their lives wondering why everyone else is so uptight.

The solution to whether or not trans men should be allowed to use women’s bathrooms is to remove all gender segregation and let men and women piss, shit and shower together. This sounds outrageous if you’ve never experienced it, but that’s not because it’s crazy. It’s because you’ve been indoctrinated with your society’s cultural norms. If everyone walked around naked together, like in the shower scene in “Starship Troopers,” we would all just get on with our lives and not worry about other people’s bodies.

At some point, someone may get raped by sharing bathrooms, but I sincerely believe there will be less rapes overall because society’s sexual frustration level will be lower across the board. If we’re going to segregate the sexes and force people to hide their skin, then we can’t condemn cultures that force women to cover their entire bodies. They’re doing the same thing as you. They’ve just taken your moderate style of oppression and ran with it to its inevitable conclusion.

Who you choose to have sex with is just as much of a non-issue as what clothes you wear or who sees your genitals. Sexual attraction is partly determined by hormones and partly by choice. Either way, if you get stranded on a deserted island for the rest of your life, eventually, you’re going to fuck whatever is there, even if your only companion is a sheep.

It’s an understatement to say everyone is bi-sexual. Humans are omni-sexual. The most accurate way to define humans isn’t heterosexual or homosexual. We’re all just fuck bots. When you remove the social pressure to only have one type of sex, people will fuck just about anything. This isn’t immoral. It’s amoral. It doesn’t matter where you stick your dick, what you stick inside of you, or what orifice you stick it in… as long as nobody gets hurt or is forced to do something against their will.

Everyone over the age of thirty has thought, even just for a second, about fucking something that isn’t a member of the opposite sex. Most of us have fucked our hand or a toy, but we don’t have a special name for that, because we don’t care. Imagine if we told people that if you ever think about having sex with a pocket pussy, it makes you a latex-ophile, which is how you must have been born and thus how you have to identify yourself and behave.

There are undoubtedly millions of men and women who had a passing thought that they might like to have intercourse with someone of their own sex. But because society says only gay people think about that, people often assume their one-off fantasy must mean they’re gay and therefore have to wear rainbow flags and act flamboyant. If we’d all grown up believing humans are just horny fuck bots and it doesn’t matter how you achieve orgasm, we’d all get on with our lives and not end up basing our personality on our sexual fantasies.

I’m not saying it’s wrong to identify as gay. Some people have the right cocktail of hormones that predispose them to wanting to have gay sex. However, they’re not going to burst into flames if they decide to have heterosexual intercourse. So all I’m saying is it’s unnecessary to force people into conforming to a social group that fits their fantasies. Many militant homosexuals and heterosexuals alike are guilty of forcing this dichotomy on others.

In conclusion, progressives are correct that there are more than two choices for how to live. However, forcing people to pick one of eighty labels, and then demonizing people who don’t, is oppressive in exactly the same way as forcing people to pick between one of two labels and demonizing those who don’t fit your expectations. The left has become guilty of enforcing too many labels, and the right has been guilty of enforcing too few. The solution is to get rid of the need for any labels by not giving a fuck about other people.

Most people who read this probably won’t agree with half of what I’ve said, but I believe history will vindicate me. I believe the future will look like Star Trek, where everyone wears gender neutral onesies because people will have stopped worrying about socially constructed gender differences. There will also be men who wear dresses and women who wear combat boots. Everyone will be showering with each other and having casual sex. The world won’t end. Life will go on, and everyone will get more of what they want.

Most people alive today will be glad they won’t live to see the new world, because they can’t let go of their traditions, which are based on archaic and intellectually lazy labels for sex and gender. If it’s any consolation, your children won’t have to pick their gender identity on a unicorn chart, and adults won’t have to pick between eighty different labels when they fill out employment applications, because nobody will care enough to make that distinction.

If you liked this post, you may like these:

 

 


Tweets by The Wise Sloth: Feb 2017-April 2017

  • My entire life I haven’t been waiting to see what problem my president solves next, I’ve been waiting to see what problem he creates next.
  • Watching the Teenage Mutant Ninja turtles growing up, it always confused me that the smartest member of the team wasn’t the leader.
  • Bruce Wayne should have hired 10,000 mercenaries and a wise council to fight evil instead of spending millions on a one-man vigilante fetish
  • “Teaching kids that the Earth is 6k years old is like teaching them that the distance across the United States is 17 feet.” Lawrence Krauss (paraphrased)
  • The more you tell yourself the world is on your shoulders, the more it will feel like it.
  • It might save the world if everyone criticizes three things about their group every time they criticize one thing about another group.
  • If your plan to fight poverty involves making the rich, richer, you don’t understand economics.
  • Moderate Americans and Muslims should strategize to redouble their efforts to educate their extreme members instead of passively enabling them
  • It baffles me how people absorb news and wisdom from around the world on phones, then use the same apps to say technology is tearing us apart.
  • You can tell the size of someone’s weed habit by the size of their grinder.

  • Just once I’d like to hear an American president tell all Americans to not act like victims and throw tantrums when their flaws are exposed.
  • The road to bankruptcy and debt is paved with “opportunities of a lifetime.”
  • America’s education system is so broken, it would be better to go 100% digital and close all brick and mortar schools.
  • The more rules you have to follow that stress you out, the more likely your soldiers and/or politicians must be failing at their job.
  • The more often and intensely you’re afraid of accidentally or unintentionally breaking the law, the more likely you live in a police state.
  • It baffles me that in 2017 there are still people who believe politicians care about what people who haven’t given them money think.
  • If you believe your bank cares about you, you’re wildly mistaken. Their job isn’t to help you get money. Their job is to take your money.
  • We need yard work appreciation day, where he who does all the yard work relaxes while his family experiences his pain for one day each year.
  • Most self-help, motivation and leadership books either teach how to be a more enthusiastic slave or slaver.
  • I want an app that calculates the shortest path and with the least amount of turns to mow your lawn.
  • “Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies. It’s your convictions that make you vulnerable to lies.”
  • “If the same kind of thing keeps happening to you over and over, it’s probably not other people or random chance.”

  • I love how freedom of religion prevents oppression but hate how much it’s used to justify oppressing those who want to be free from religion
  • I bet most people in North Korea don’t put any stock in the book, “The Secret.”
  • “The most dangerous lie is the one closest to the truth.”
  • If the Easter Bunny were a unicorn, we wouldn’t celebrate Easter, because it would force us to confront the fact that we celebrate mythology
  • You’d think humans would have learned by now, when a politician asks for more power, it’s for their benefit, at your expense.
  • Either all your exes are jerks or nobody wants to stay with a spoiled brat who throws hate-tantrums every time you don’t get what you want.
  • Radical SJWs and feminists need to embrace Abraham Lincoln’s words, “Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?”
  • Americans need licenses to do anything but go to church. As long as that line isn’t crossed, we accept having to apply/pay for our freedoms.
  • I wish Americans were as concerned with the freedom to buy medicine without a prescription as they are about freedom of religion.
  • It would solve so many problems later in life if schools taught children how to take a hint.
  • “A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him.”David Brinkley
  • “People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.” Unknown
  • The attitude you have as a parent is what your kids will learn from more than what you tell them.” Jim Henson
  • The only thing that overcomes hard luck is hard work.” Harry Golden
  • Just once I’d like to hear America’s celebrity doctors say America’s health care system could be fixed by doctors boycotting insurance.

  • You cross a line and do something to your soul when you wear sweat pants to a strip club.
  • You can’t pretend you’re not old anymore after you start meeting kids who are too young to remember the things that defined your childhood.
  • The more you find yourself telling people to give your hero a second chance, the more likely you should give your hero a second look.
  • The more passionately you support any American politician, the more you should doubt your objectivity and double check you’re not wrong.
  • Americans have proven they can’t protest without rioting. It’s about time they try something different.
  • There tends to be an inverse correlation between the amount of time you spend complaining and the amount of time you spend doing something.
  • Just because someone says something you disagree with, that doesn’t mean they’re against you. They may just be for facts, and you’re wrong.
  • “The real problem of humanity … we have Palaeolithic emotions; medieval institutions; and godlike technology.”
  • I wish humanity was as passionate about devoting resources to emigrating off Earth as we are stopping people from immigrating around Earth.
  • “We will not believe more than we know, and we will not live higher than our beliefs.”
  • When Christians say they don’t know or believe the Bible unambiguously approves of slavery, I assume they’re totally Biblically illiterate.
  • It’s baffling how many parents give their children religious books they’ve never read as their primary instruction book on life.
  • It’s baffling how few parents have written instruction books for life to give to their children.
  • Every time you watch a TV commercial, you get dumber.
  • If you still trust American news stations after the 2016 POTUS election, your standards of journalistic ethics are catastrophically low.
  • Wisdom is too important to wait for it to fall into your lap. Not constantly seeking/collecting it is how you stay an idiot your whole life.
  • If you can’t make yourself happy, you will inevitably make your lover miserable.
  • There are two types of rules: 1. Time-tested best practices for accomplishing a goal 2. Bullshit someone made up to control others

  • The longer you complain about being a victim, but have no plan to fix anything, the more likely you just have a delusional victim complex.
  • Give Trump a chance, they said. Every chance he’s had, he proved his worst critics right. How many more chances does he get?
  • America would be a very different place if Trump’s supporters were as critical of him as they were of Obama.
  • Trump bombed Syria for using WMDs. Then he uses a MOAB in Afghanistan, which has never been used because it fits the criteria of a WMD.
  • The quickest way to piss off someone in a cult is to tell them they’re in a cult.
  • Schools should have classes that teach you how/why not to throw tantrums when you don’t get what you want.
  • The easiest way to distract Americans is to make a controversial, heart-wrenching human interest story go viral.
  • A guy getting kicked off an overbooked flight is not the most important thing happening today and not what everyone should be talking about.
  • Aliens would be baffled by how much comedy humans watch on TV while our world is dying from wars, corruption, atrocities, oppression and waste

  • Proving to people you’re right all the time is more likely a symptom of your insecurity and shortsightedness than strength and genius.
  • Politicians and soldiers should be as concerned about protecting us from insurance companies as they are about protecting us from terrorists
  • If politicians could be dishonorably discharged for negligence, bad conduct and crime, all of America’s congress would qualify for one.
  • Just once I’d like to hear a politician advocate setting limits to how many laws a politician can break before being dishonorably discharged
  • “The price of originality is criticism. The value of originality is priceless.”
  • American culture teaches children to question how things have always been done almost as much as it teaches them traditions are sacrosanct.
  • Just once I’d like to hear a politician talk about the need for grocery store reform because the system we got is creating obesity and poverty
  • Masculinity is toxic, said no feminist to their mechanics, plumbers, or soldiers ever.
  • Congressmen/women, who are picked by voters in single states, get to decide laws that affect every other state. Totally defeats the purpose.
  • At least once in my life, I’d like to hear a politician say voters should have the ability to veto politicians out of office by popular vote.
  • The reason cheerleaders exist is to cover up the fact that sports are boring.
  • If massage therapists have to do continuing education to keep their job, so should Congress.
  • My high school history teacher once told my class America was founded by criminals, slaves and religious freaks. It seems nothing has changed.
  • Growing experiences tend to come with growing pains. Accept it. Embrace it. Get on with it.

  • When a woman complains to you about a problem, don’t offer solutions and rationalizations. Just actively listen. All you have to do is wait.
  • Writers have two choices: 1. Write about the most important topics they can. 2. Write things that distract people from more important topics
  • The angrier the poor get at the rich, the more the media tells them to be angry at another group of people.
  • If you believe there’s a liberal conspiracy to destroy America, the problem is you believe anything any fear-peddling shock jock sells you.
  • Knowledge is knowing the right answers. Wisdom is asking the right questions.
  • Rod Serling’s monologs in “The Twilight Zone” tend to make as much sense as The Ultimate Warrior’s monologs in the WWF.

  • Your job is more of an opportunity for your employer than for you.
  • Women, you can’t make your boyfriend or husband better by bitching at him. You can only do that by loving, supporting and building him up.
  • Anyone pissed about white privilege would have their jealousy cured by spending a week living with me in my trailer by the train tracks.
  • The more times you’ve justified beating someone smaller than you, the more likely you’re a god damn ass hole.
  • The more attention you pay to sports, the less important things you learn or act on.
  • Neither God or our ancestors would be proud of how our economy is designed to fuck people harder, the poorer they are.
  • No matter where you live, if you’re proud of being in the majority, you’re probably proud of being a gullible, surface-thinking idiot.
  • If there are an infinite number of universes, then there’s a universe out there somewhere where each of us have had sex with Bill Nye.
  • Some people are confident in social situations because they practice success. Other people are confident because they just don’t give a fuck
  • If you’re hyperactive and can’t stay still, and you don’t have a hobby, you’re leaving money and meaning on the table.
  • If Putin helped Trump win the election, it was probably more to help America fail than to help Trump succeed.
  • I wish the Republican Party would stop putting on pretenses and just change their name to the Fox News Party.
  • When someone asks for forgiveness for something they’re not really sorry for, they’re really asking for permission.
  • Trump could improve his approval rating quicker and easier by solving a few simple real problems than by grandstanding and sideshowing.

 

  • Today’s excuses become tomorrow’s regrets.
  • How do you create 1 rich person? By creating 10 poor people.
  • I wonder how many homes and gardens could have been built with the money America has spent spying on its citizens.
  • As long as there are for-profit prisons, ticket quotas and a war on drugs, there are no good cops, only accomplices to crime at best.
  • If you contradict everything I say, I’m going to give up trying to talk to you.
  • Despite what their advertisements and website say, anyone who would charge you 30% interest is not your friend.
  • If we protect people from hunger as zealously as we protect them from having their feelings hurt, we’d all love life and probably each other.
  • Elton John’s music would have been more interesting if he was goth.
  • We promote and incentivize women getting in STEM fields for equality, but where’s the push for gender equality in all the most deadly jobs?
  • Luckily, in America, the First Amendment allows you to speak freely about all your other rights the RNC and DNC are constantly taking away.
  • Every month hundreds of millions of Americans celebrate their freedom by living paycheck to paycheck.
  • Life according to conservativism: Blindly defending Democrats = sheep. Blindly defending Republicans = patriot. Not defending either = slacker
  • Just once I wish someone watching reality TV would drop their head in their hands and mumble, “Fuck. I’m what’s wrong with this world.”

  • Every year Americans celebrate their freedom by paying hundreds of dollars to renew their professional licenses that arbitrarily expired.
  • It’s ironic when Muslims say Islam is a religion of peace, since Muslim extremists have killed more Muslims than non-Muslims by magnitudes.
  • The dumber the individual, the dumber the whole. We all have a personal and civic responsibility to not be stupid.
  • The more emotional a news host is, the more likely they’re a shock jock.
  • American presidents are as synonymous with dishonesty as American military recruiters are.
  • Whatever your favorite radio DJ personalities are most excited about, you should not be.
  • For some reason, people hate it when you wear black shoes with a brown belt or visa/versa. It doesn’t make any sense, but be prepared for it
  • The statement, “The more money you have, the better life is,” is more true than the statement, “The more male you are, the better life is.”
  • The statement, “The more money you have, the better life is,” is more true than the statement, “The more white you are, the better life is.”
  • The angrier and more frightened watching the news makes you, the less likely you’re watching real journalistic new reporting.
  • If your plan to make the world better is to kill, incarcerate or deport all the bad guys, you’re probably one of the bad guys.

 


Tales From The Wise Sloth: The Time I Got HIV

In 2005 I was a Senior Airman (rank E-4) in the U.S. Air Force. My job title was 3C0X1, aka Communications Computer Systems Operator, aka all-purpose computer nerd. I was stationed at Sembach Air Base, which is located in Southwest Germany, about a twenty minute drive from both Ramstein Air Base and the Army’s Landstuhl Medical Center.

smoke break

Since Ramstein is the largest Air Force base in Europe, and Landstuhl is the largest military hospital outside the continental United States, this is where the military sends all the wounded soldiers from the Middle East. Several times a year, Sembach would have a blood drive due to the high volume of blood needed for all the incoming wounded soldiers. I love the idea of giving blood, but every time I do, my blood spews out so fast I get light headed, nauseous and almost pass out. They always have to elevate my head and put a cold pack on my neck, which is pretty embarrassing. However, that first world problem pales in comparison to soldiers needing emergency transfusions. So I did my duty and opened my veins for my brothers and sisters.

Another reason I’m hesitant to give blood is because I had hepatitis when I was four years old. It wasn’t sexually transmitted, and I recovered from it. Multiple blood tests have shown it’s not in my system anymore. I couldn’t have enlisted if it was, but I always worried my blood might be dirty. However, this didn’t stop me from giving blood, because they test every donation for diseases. So if there was anything there, they’d catch it.

Since the military had already tested and inoculated me for everything you can be tested and inoculated for, I didn’t give my blood donation a second thought until a few weeks later when I stopped by the base post office to check my mail on my lunch break. That day I received an official letter from the military, which I had to sign for. This was highly unusual. So my heart rate was a little elevated when I opened the letter. My mind raced, trying to guess what I may have gotten in trouble for.

The news was much worse than I imagined. To my horror, the letter said my recent blood donation had tested positive for HIV, and I needed to contact the medical squadron as soon as possible to have another test done to confirm the results. By the time I finished reading the document, my head was spinning and darkness filled my peripheral vision.

I went back to work and tried to go through the rest of my day acting like nothing was wrong, but my head felt like a black hole, as if everything good had been sucked out of my life, leaving an existential vacuum in its place. Nothing mattered anymore. I was no longer working towards retirement. All of my hopes and dreams were unreachable. There was nothing left for me to do but wait to die… and give the bad news to my family, friends and most recent sexual partners.

Unable to face reality, I let a week pass without contacting the medical squadron. I walked through each day in a daze, watching what happened to me from a thousand miles away. I made a list of my sexual partners, which wasn’t long. I decided who the most likely culprit to give me this horrible disease was, a promiscuous Air Force girl from my previous base. I obsessed over who else I may have accidentally infected by having any kind of physical contact with, which I knew wasn’t possible, but my mind was stuck in panic mode.

I’d already had my last will and testament drawn up by a military lawyer a year earlier. So I didn’t have to worry about that, but I spent dozens of hours plotting my final words and trying to decide what to do with the few years I had left. As I ate tasteless food or carried on pointless small talk with my coworkers, I thought about my regrets and everything I wouldn’t get to do in the future. I didn’t try bargaining with God, because that would have been pointless. I was already a dead man walking. All I could do was make the most of my fleeting time and try to cry as little as possible. Mostly I thought about those poor souls I’d infected and needed to hurry up and pass on the tragic news to.

I didn’t want to tell anyone my secret until I knew for sure I had HIV. Lucky for them, even though I was dragging my feet, the Air Force wasn’t. A female nurse called me at work and asked if I’d received an official letter recently. I said, “Yes.” The nurse asked me what it was about, and I replied I’d rather not say out loud. I knew my boss, whose office sat caddy-corner from my desk, eavesdropped on my conversations. The nurse asked me to say the first letter of the pertinent word, and I said, “H.” After confirming she didn’t need to break the bad news to me herself, she scheduled an appointment at Ramstein a few days later for me to give more blood for further testing.

On the day of the test I told my boss I had to go to Ramstein for a routine medical checkup. Twenty minutes later I sulked into the medical clinic. As a male nurse quietly drew my blood, I asked how accurate the initial test was. He looked me in the eyes and said in a meaningful tone of voice, “Ninety-seven percent.”

I went home that night and got drunk, as I’d done every night for the past week. Even with all the lights in my apartment on, everything looked dark. It was like living in the Twilight Zone, where the rules of the universe were different for me, and not in a good way. The only ray of hope my mind could latch onto was that there had been a mistake, but I couldn’t take a three percent chance of a fluke happening seriously.  I’d have better odds of winning the lottery.

Fast forward several more months of bleakness, despair and blood tests. As fate would have it, I did win the Twilight Zone lottery. A ninety-seven percent accurate HIV test means three percent of the people who take it, win an existential nightmare that ends with them receiving a new lease on life. I’ve had more STD tests since then, and they all confirm I never had HIV. Plus, all of my sexual partners from that time are healthy and alive.

Part of my brain tells me I should be mad at the world for giving me a false death sentence, but in the end, it was a blessing in disguise. I almost feel bad for anyone who hasn’t had to go through that. It’s so easy to take life for granted and let the years slip by without really thinking about what’s important or how you should spend what little time you have on Earth. I basically got my mid-life crisis out of the way at the age of 25.

People told me I was crazy when I immigrated to New Zealand at the age of 29 despite having never visited the country. In my mind, the risk of not experiencing life to its fullest outweighed anything that could possibly go wrong. I only spent three years in New Zealand, and during that time a lot of things did go wrong, but experience has taught me, you’re not having an adventure if everything goes right. And as a wiser man than myself once said, “The summer would not be so sweet, were it not for the winter.” When bad things happen to me, and those two pieces of wisdom don’t put things into perspective, I can always remind myself, at least I don’t have AIDS.

The other thing I took away from this experience is that it’s important to leave something good behind when you inevitably die. I don’t have any money to shower the poor with, but the one thing I do have is wisdom gained through often unpleasant experiences that I don’t want to be in vain. This is a big part of why I’m in such a mad dash to write as much as I can regardless of how little it pays. I hope my blog and books inspire, enlighten and entertain you. That’s all I need to take to my grave.

P.S.

Here’s a link to a free copy of my E-book, “Why: An Agnostic Perspective on the Meaning of Life.”

If you liked this story, you may like these other Tales From The Wise Sloth:


An imagined conversation with my abusive, narcissistic father

I haven’t spoken to my father in over ten years, and I’ve often imagined how our next conversation may go, if it ever happens. I needed to vent this for a while, but I didn’t because it’s TMI. I’m doing it anyway, not to be emo or fish for sympathy. My hope is that, if anyone else raised by an abusive, narcissistic parent reads this, it might make them feel less alone and less crazy.

If you identified with this post, you may enjoy the Reddit forum, “Raised by Narcissists.”


%d bloggers like this: