October 30, 2009

5 Reasons Why Prostitution Should Be Legal

By wise sloth

Picture of protestors marching down a city street carrying a banner that says, "SEXWORKERS RIGHTS = HUMAN RIGHTS"

 

1. Security

Prostitutes need security more than a designer clothing store. So much so that illegal prostitutes get pimps who extort them. As horrible as that is, it’s better than not having a pimp. In Holland, the prostitutes get big, bad bouncers. One guy told me about a brothel he went to in Cologne, Germany where they had pit bulls. Now, who do you think has more dead hookers, New York or Cologne? But America doesn’t care whether or not a hooker dies because they’re immoral. Good ol’ Christian values at work there… that do more harm than good.

 

2. Sanitation

You’re more likely to get an STD from someone at a club than from a porn star or a Dutch prostitute. They get medical checkups so often it’d make a hypochondriac cream his pants. Seriously, abortion is legal and prostitution isn’t? The only reason abortion was ever passed in a country that won’t let you cuss on television is because too many women were getting backroom abortions and were dying from any number of medical problems.

That’s horrible seeing as how I suspect one of the main reasons prostitution is still illegal in America is because the American women don’t want the competition. Imagine this commercial for the brothel that may someday open up down the street from your house:

 

3. Women’s dignity

How bad would your life have to get to risk getting arrested for going to work every day, risking getting murdered, beaten, humiliated, and infected with a disease? These women aren’t immoral fluzies. They’re desperate. Their lives suck on levels you and I can’t even imagine. And be keeping prostitution legalize we’re supporting that. We spend millions of dollars a year oppressing prostitutes and destroying their lives. Their tears and blood on our hands. Fuck that. I don’t that responsibility laid at my feet. Somebody wants to make a little money, mutually consensually, making lonely people happy in a safe and sterile environment what do I care? I don’t want my tax dollars going to keeping those two people unhappy and unsafe. And quite frankly I’m disgusted at anybody who would.

 

4. Reduce rape

Why risk going to jail and destroying your conscience by raping someone when you can go buy a hooker with no hassle? A veto for prostitution is a vote for rape. Make a campaign button out of that.

 

5. Economic stimulation

Prostitutes make more money. Businesses make more money. The economy grows. With the economic problems we’ve got these days and the amount of people wanting a little relief now’s the perfect time to legalize prostitution. Here’s my campaign slogan: “PROSTITUTION: IT’LL DO YOU GOOD!”

 

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This entry was posted on Friday, October 30th, 2009 at 4:36 am and tagged with , , , , , , , , , and posted in American Laws. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

One response to “5 Reasons Why Prostitution Should Be Legal”

  • Jd
    April 22nd, 2014 at 8:25 am

    For such a topic these are all legit points, especially with the conclusion that the economy will wise, because people will be less focused on wanting sex all the time when it would be 100 times easier to get it, thus boosting ones motivation and mindset to put into the effort of what matters in the persons life rather then sitting at work fantasizing about fucking that good looking co worker with the low cut shirt. Genius.

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