October 22, 2017

(Comic) How Civilians Protesting Works

By wise sloth

(Comic) How Civilians Protesting Works

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TRANSCRIPT

 

A crowd of protesters are loitering in front of Wall Street. A policeman approaches the
crowd.
NARRATOR
One day on Wall Street…
COP
What are you peopling doing here? Don’t you know it’s illegal for this many people to be in the
same place at the same time unless you’re buying something?
PROTESTOR
It’s cool. Don’t worry about it. We’re protesting against how billionaires have bought out the
government and used their backroom influence to create an unconscionable disparity of wealth
and power in this country.
COP
The correct way to go about having your voices heard in government is to vote between two
candidates whose campaigns are financed by billionaires.
PROTESTOR
Believe me. We’ve tried that…with predictable results. That’s our point. Our voices aren’t being
heard in government. You think we want to be sleeping on the streets?
COP
*sigh* fine. I’ll let you protest for a little while, but you have to do it quietly behind fences where
nobody will notice you.
PROTESTOR
…so we only have the freedom of speech as long as we speak in the most noncommittal way that
eliminates any leverage our voice could have?
COP
It either that or get beat, tazed, maced, arrested, fined and saddled with a criminal record.
PROTESTOR
But we haven’t broken any laws!
COP
We’ll cook up some excuse to arrest you.
PROTESTOR
So that’s the government’s official stance on people who protest against government corruption?
COP
That shouldn’t surprise you. The billionaires you’re protesting against just donated 4.6 million
dollars to our police force, and the president and the mayor are both in bed with them.
PROTESTOR
That just underscores how important it is for us to be protesting. We’re not going anywhere.
COP
Okay, but FYI, police are almost never held accountable for excessive use of force.
NARRATOR
Meanwhile in living rooms across the country…
SCENE: A man is sitting on his couch in a poor looking house. Faux News Network is playing on
the television.
MAN
I’ll just watch a little television to take my mind off the fact that I’m unemployed and my house
is being foreclosed on…
TELEVISION
The people responsible for the financial collapse have instructed us to inform you that pinheaded
anarchists are disturbing the peace on Wall Street. Hopefully, the police will teach those whiny
brats a lesson very soon.
MAN
Stupid protesters.

THE END

This entry was posted on Sunday, October 22nd, 2017 at 4:39 pm and tagged with , , , , , , , and posted in American Laws, How America Works. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

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